Spiritual Journey . . . Grieving the Loss of a Parent

Photo Courtesy of Kari Flores
Photo Courtesy of Kari Flores

This blog is dedicated to my mom who passed away in August 2016.

I never knew that Dragonflies were related to death until the day my mom died.  It was a Sunday evening in August and my husband, daughter and I had just come home from a dinner out.  When we arrived home, there were about 100 dragonflies above our heads right outside our garage.  It was an amazing sight and it had never happened in the 17 years that we had lived at our house.

Within one hour, we received a call from my mom’s nursing home saying that she was close to dying and that we should come as soon as possible.   By the time we arrived she had already died.  I was overcome with grief that I wasn’t there for her last moments of life.

I never understand the meaning of dragonflies and death until a few days later.

The next day my sisters and I visited the funeral home to make arrangements for my mom and when we went downstairs to pick out the urn, I noticed a beautiful dragonfly necklace to hold a loved ones ashes.  At that point, I was still in shock and didn’t connect the dots until later that week.

On Wednesday, the day before my mom’s funeral, I was heading out on my back deck when a beautiful and large dragonfly flew into my hair. Startled, I back into the house and it flew out of my hair and flew around my dining area and out the back door.  At that point, I realized that this was not a coincidence.

I realized that the dragonfly was somehow related to mom and that I knew she was okay.   I knew that the dragonfly was my mom or an angel and that it was a symbol of life after death.

The next day we had a beautiful and private ceremony for my mom.

On Saturday, my husband, David, Sophie (our chocolate lab) and I decided to go swimming since it was a beautiful and warm August summer day.  I was mentally and physically exhausted from the death of my mom and David thought a swim would be exactly what the doctor ordered  . . . and it was indeed.   As I was swimming, another beautiful and large dragonfly landed on my head and stayed there for about 10 minutes.  I was amazed and content because I knew that the dragonfly was again letting me know that my mom was okay.

A week later, at about 9:30 at night while I was getting ready for bed, I heard Sophie start to growl downstairs.  I didn’t think anything of it until the next morning when my husband had told me why she had started growling.  I guess there had been tapping at our side door that leads to the garage.  We always leave our garage doors open during the nice weather until we go to bed.  This night was no different except when Sophie and Dave heard tapping at the back door.   Alarmed, my husband walked to the back door, grabbed a knife and proceeded to open the door.   To his amazement, once he opened the door, a large and beautiful dragonfly flew into the house.

So I called the funeral home and inquired about the meaning of dragonflies and they said it signified the spirit of a loved one.

I never really thought about life after death until my mom became ill with what we and the doctor believed to be lung cancer. We had tried to do a biopsy but her lungs collapsed and the only other way to check to see if she had lung cancer was very invasive.    So she had decided not to do anything since she had no pain. So when the end was nearing, hospice came in while she was at the nursing home to help ease her pain and suffering.

The last few weeks of my mom’s life was horrific, she was unable to eat or drink, so she was slowly starving to death.  My father had also died of lung cancer when I was 19 years old and at that time I really never thought about death.   However, with my mom it was different.  I was fast approaching my 50th birthday and had started to wonder about life after death.  So I started to read books about near death experiences and the three books that changed my life were “Near Death in the ICU” by Laurin Bellg, MD, “Proof of Heaven . . .” by Eben Alexander, MD and “To Heaven and Back” by Mary C. Neal, MD .

These books made me realize that there is life after death and I believe they helped me spiritually open my mind.

If in some way this article brings you joy or helps ease the pain you may be experiencing from the loss of a loved; I would love to hear from you.

2 thoughts on “Spiritual Journey . . . Grieving the Loss of a Parent”

  1. Debbie, I too saw, a wonder when my mom passed and I was told that butterflies were a sign of a loved one when they passed and I had so many butterflies around me when my mom passed, since then I have had dragonflies everywhere and landing on me, I had not realized the connection between dragonflies and our loved ones that have moved on, how absolutely wonderful and comforting. I too read To Heaven and Back and was amazed. Thanks for sharing your story, I will check this blog regularly.

    1. Kristen, thank you for sharing your story as well about your mom. I never knew that butterflies were also a sign of a loved one passing.

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